At Random
Summer Vacation!
“No more pencils, no more books. No more teachers’ dirty looks. Out for summer, out ‘till fall. We might not come back at all.”
The Parental Affirmation See and Say
Do you struggle with your children's lack of gratitude?
Dad Jokes For Father’s Day!
Two telecom executives got married. The wedding was OK but the reception was incredible.
More Middle-Aged Fantasy-Hotline Theater
Thank you for calling the Middle-Aged Fantasy Hotline, one of our specially trained operators will be with you shortly.
Best Of Jokes—From Bob Kargenian
Last month, we ran a bra-shopping joke submitted by our good friend, Bob Kargenian of TABR Capital Management. Embarrassingly, the punch line was cut off in the hard copy version.
In The Navy (Bob Kargenian)
An Admiral visits one of the ships under his command. While eating breakfast with the crew, he was impressed to see the naval insignia stamped on every biscuit.
Perspective (Bob Kargenian)
Next time you’re feeling down, remember that life is all about perspective.
The Rye Bread (Bob Kargenian)
Two old guys, one aged 80 and the other aged 87, were sitting on a park bench one morning.
We’re Moving!
Like many pioneers before us, The Leuthold Group is pulling up stakes and heading West.
Micro-Flavor Blast!
Award-winning flavored microplastics that bring the taste back to your food.
A New American!
After an arduous slog through our nation’s bureaucratic system, Leuthold’s very own Maria Holliday-Mitchell became a naturalized U.S. citizen last month.
Keith Richards Will Bury Us All
On dental care: “Miraculously, due to abstinence and prayer, my teeth grew back.”
Swiss Encounter
A Swiss guy, looking for directions, pulls up at a street corner where two American tourists are standing.
At The Butcher
A woman gets off work and goes to the butcher to buy a chicken.
Bra Shopping—From Bob Kargenian
A man walks into the lingerie department at Macy’s, and tells the sales lady, “I would like a Southern Baptist bra for my wife, size 34 B.”
MLB Payroll Madness
The first pitch of the Major League season should have coincided with vigorous protests outside of stadiums in Miami, Tampa Bay, Pittsburgh, Cleveland, and the south side of Chicago.
Trade War Monopoly
Snuff out globalization.
Zack Greinke Starts The Season
On his favorite award: “I’ve only kept one award in my whole life, and it’s the coolest thing ever. Mizuno gave me a samurai sword for winning the Cy Young. It’s awesome.”
Job Posting: Golf Course Ranger
Bushwood Country Club is hiring a golf-course ranger for the 2025 season.
Used Lawn Mower
A priest buys a lawn mower for the parish house at a yard sale.