At Random
We’re Moving!
Like many pioneers before us, The Leuthold Group is pulling up stakes and heading West.
Micro-Flavor Blast!
Award-winning flavored microplastics that bring the taste back to your food.
A New American!
After an arduous slog through our nation’s bureaucratic system, Leuthold’s very own Maria Holliday-Mitchell became a naturalized U.S. citizen last month.
Keith Richards Will Bury Us All
On dental care: “Miraculously, due to abstinence and prayer, my teeth grew back.”
Swiss Encounter
A Swiss guy, looking for directions, pulls up at a street corner where two American tourists are standing.
At The Butcher
A woman gets off work and goes to the butcher to buy a chicken.
Bra Shopping—From Bob Kargenian
A man walks into the lingerie department at Macy’s, and tells the sales lady, “I would like a Southern Baptist bra for my wife, size 34 B.”
MLB Payroll Madness
The first pitch of the Major League season should have coincided with vigorous protests outside of stadiums in Miami, Tampa Bay, Pittsburgh, Cleveland, and the south side of Chicago.
Trade War Monopoly
Snuff out globalization.
Zack Greinke Starts The Season
On his favorite award: “I’ve only kept one award in my whole life, and it’s the coolest thing ever. Mizuno gave me a samurai sword for winning the Cy Young. It’s awesome.”
Job Posting: Golf Course Ranger
Bushwood Country Club is hiring a golf-course ranger for the 2025 season.
Used Lawn Mower
A priest buys a lawn mower for the parish house at a yard sale.
On The Farm
A Minnesota farmer sat on his front porch looking out over his crops.
A Call From The Lawyer
A New York attorney called his wealthy art-collector client.
At The Bar
An old couple walks into the bar.
We Made It To March
A puff of glorious Pacific air recently helped us turn our calendars to March. That act means the hard part of the year, up here in the thawing North, is behind us.
L. Thomas Snyder, Attorney At Law
DO YOU HAVE A SIBLING? Stand up for your rights!
Bob Gibson Points Us To Spring Training
On throwing hard: “Have you ever thrown a ball 100 miles an hour? Everything hurts. Even your ass hurts. I see pictures of my face and say, ‘Holy shit,’ but that’s the strain you feel when you throw.”
Another “Onion” Attempt
Deep in an argument about household responsibilities with his wife, longtime husband Peter Rogers tried out what he thought was a sure-fire, argument-ender for the first time
Back At The Bar
An Irishman, an Italian, and a Norwegian are in a bar. They are having a good time and all agree that the bar is a nice place.
Perception for the Professional
May 2025 Issue
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May 2025 Issue
